Chapter 16: ...."cause i love you"

"How come you are here?"


"Cause i am psychic............. cause i love you"


Although she was glad to see him there and was very happy to hear him say those 3 words her initial reaction betrayed her. She still wasn't really ready to have him in her life yet. She awkwardly changed the subject to the weather. He felt her discomfort, but was determine to push forward.



"Charmaine, please..... please stop pushing me away, i don't care whether Ray is still in your heart, i do not need to own it 100% i would be satisfied with just 1%, because it means you have me, no matter how much i mean to you, you are still everything of mine"



He was grabbing her shoulders and starring straight at her by now, tears was starting to form, she didn't know how to react, but his following words changed her heart.



"What would have happened if the guy did not pull you out of you car in time? i might not have been able to see you, or tell to you anymore. Please just give me a chance, a chance to protect you, to love you, to care for you."



With that he pulled out a ring for her.



"Please at least give me this chance"



She starred back at him and smiled.



"Errrrmm..... are you going to just kill my shoulders or put on the ring for me?"



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"Oi, so did you hear what the doctor said?"

"Yes, yes, yes omg you are so long winded, becareful that no one wants to marry you in the future"

"What happened to you marrying me???"

"Huh?? you think i had a brain op or a heart op? I swear i never said such thing, are you sure you are not thinking about Desmond?"

"Very funny, who was the one that kept teasing him that if he doesn't want me he would be the one that would marry me instead?"

"Haha you gotta be kidding right? You treat those kind of jokes as serious jokes?"

"LOL..... you don't have to be so scared i was only kidding.... who would fall for such a kid like you?"



Somehow his words pierced through her heart, she didn't know why she felt that way? Was she really mixing him up with Des? Or was she really falling for him? She was getting really confused herself.



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People always said that happy times always fly by, she had to agree, since they left New York they decided to travel around, at first it was only US, then Kevin suggested hoping over to Europe, then he also wanted to explore Africa, they have been travelling non stop for more then 3 months. But she was very happy, Kevin loved her alot. He was very protective. He keeps saying that he would love her and only her forever. She never though that she could ever believe words from another man after the incident from Ray. But she did and because of this she actually began to despise Ray. For causing such pain.



But such thoughs were only instrumental. They only came when she was alone, which was rarely the case becuase Kevin was like super glue which was stuck to her permenantly, and she loved that feeling, she was scared that like Ray if she allowed too much freedom to Kevin he too, might change.

He was talking on the phone right now, she was wondering who was he talking to. He sounded very polite . She wondered whether it was a girl. After all he is wealthy, handsome and smart. Surely he must have a lot of admirers. She began to wonder why he actually liked her, after all shes just so normal. Was he playing with her? The phone call finally ended. She realise she was so fickle. One second she says that Kev loves her a lot but the next second her security levels are down the drain.

"Who was that? Was it a girl?"

Sensing her insecurity he decided to play a joke on her.

"Yeap it was, and also a very very pretty one"

"What did she want?"

"She asked me for a date."

"And did you agree to it?"

"Yeah, i did"

He is really playing her, her happy times are really about to end. She decided that no matter what she is not going to cry in front of him. But emotions were uncontrolable, she began to felt her eyes sting.

Suddenly he realised that he might have stepped over the line. He began to panick

"Hey i was only joking, it was my care taker. Please don't cry. You know you are the only one that i love now and forever. I promised myself that i would never ever want to see you cry ever again."

"You are so evil!!!! i hate you....... why are you laughing??"

"Because i know that you are jealous of my caretaker which means you love me"

"Evil!!!!!......by the way why did you caretaker call you??"

"Oh its my dads 60th Birthday next weekend we would have to go back to celebrate with him, plus i think its time that i show you to my dad"

"Hmmm...... well i think its about time that we call an end to this holiday as well."

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Brrr Brr

"Wow Mum, what makes you call me??? You haven't done that in ages"

"How dare you even say that, you are the one that NEVER EVER CALL ME!!!, so where is my precious darling now?"

"In America, so what makes her royal highness pick up the phone?"

"Its ur step-dads 60th Birthday next week, i expect you to be home. You haven't been in Hong Kong for like 6 months already!!!!, the last time i spoke to you you told me you had an emergency and had to go to US!!!!, I don't care i want to see you next week k...... you know how much your uncle misses you"

"HAHA ok ok, since his royal highness misses me so much, her humble peasent would be honoured to make an appearance"

"Stop joking with me k, i am serious"

"Its my pleasure, ok mum i will come back no worries, but i gtg now, ttyl k, Bye"

As she put down her phone, Leila turned to Ray.

"Heiz.... mums asking me to go back, and i am not leaving you alone so.....you are coming along"

Miss you finally

"KEVIN!!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!!!!! DID YOU REALISE THAT YOU JUST MADE THE COMPANY LOSE 10 MILLION DOLLARS!!!!!.................... WHAT WERE YOU THINKING WHEN YOU SIGNED THIS CONTRACT!!!!!!! IF YOU WEREN'T MY SON I WOULD HAVE FIRED YOU RIGHT NOW AT THIS MOMENT!!!!!!!! GET OUT NOW!!!!! I DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU"

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4 weeks, 28 days, 672 hours, 40320 minutes, 2419200 seconds, the time that has passed since she walked out of his life. The numbers that represents her absence. The emptiness that was now his life.

Of course he have not given up on her with all the updates that he was constantly receiving for the body guard that he "hired for her". He didn't know why he did that, maybe it was becuase he did not want to lose "sight" of her, or maybe it was becuase he was scared that if he ever did totally let go she will forget him. But the called he received last night totally devastated him.

"Kevin......"
"Cha..........................."
"Please let me go......... please ask your man to stop following me......."
"I.....i..... ju....."
"i know you intend no harm...... but like i said i want to be alone...... i need time to be alone..... i need to do this alone. I know you love me. But if you really love me then let me go. Please do not make me hate you."

With that all he could do was stare at her picture, she accepted that his silence meant consent.

"if we are ever meant to be together we would meet again one day, somewhere in this world, maybe it would be Hong Kong, or Australia or England, as long as we are both alive and if theres fate we would be together one day, and that would be the day that i would be yours. Till then i hope we can let fate decide for us. Take Care Kevin. Bye"

The phone went silent, she did not even allow him a chance to say goodbye.


FATE??? whats fate??? He never believed in it, since the death of his mum he knew that he would need to strive for what he needs. Nothing is up to fate, he is fate. But this time he really did not have an answer to her. What should he do?



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She was beginning to accept the fact that there was nobody there to rely upon anymore, she has to go through this herself, she no longer longed for the touch of Raymond, no longer yearn for his affection, no longer need him. She wants him but he is no longer her pinnicle for survival. Maybe it was just a illusion, a psycology button in her brain that has momentarily stopped working. But after 4 weeks of walking and seeing things she is really beginning to wake up.



Coming from a well to do family, she was always protected, even after she started working she was still the treasure of the family with a loving parents and a kind sister. That was probably also the reason why she fell so hard this time. She was always the player in previous relationships now shes the one that is being played. She could no longer differentiate whether she actually loved Ray that much or was it because she was angry. Whatever it is she has come to the conclusion that he was not as important to her as 4 weeks ago.



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"The operation is very successful, we have done a bypass and the clockaged has been reduced significantly, he should be awake very soon. But he should be careful as there is always a chance that his heart might stop working. He needs to take care of himself"



Seeing him laying there with all the incubators and all the masks marks the resemblances of Desmond. The way she was helpless in saving him, the way all she could do was cry, the way she could only see him suffocate and torture. These few weeks had been a roller coaster for her, with Raymon drifting in and out of conciousness and going in and out of the OT, she had returned to how it was 2 years ago. Each time he went in she was so scared that he would not come out. Each time he came out alive she was scared that he would not survive the next few days.



At the same time she seems to have developed something more of friendship for Ray, she realised that she was more worried then a normal friend would be. Was she getting it mixed up with Des? Is this a continuation of des? Second chance with the love of her life?



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Without noticing she is revisiting all the countries that Ray often flew, at least all the countries in which Ray bought her one of the small gifts, her freedom was total she could be in China one day and in France the next. She had no burden all she felt was the freedom she needed, the freedom to be excused from Torture.



And today she just reached New York, unlike the normal tourist, she never ever shops, she prefers to sight see, and of course in New York she would go to Niagara falls. She rented a car and began her journey, enjoying the cold autumish wind in the air. The scene was breath taking it was definately worth the drive. And since she was so near Canada why not drive there too?



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The incident occured too fast, way too fast for her to remember what exactly happened all she knew was that she was lucky to be brake intime and that the Mercedes Airbag did actually come into use. She got off more likely then anticipated and someone dragged her out of the rumble that exploded within seconds for the cars in the collision. She was send to the hospital to recover from shock. She had to stay overnight. Suddenly she felt very lonely. She was tempted to call Kevin. But she felt bad, she was always the one saving her and just a month ago she had told him to leave her alone. Thus she decided to force herself to sleep instead.



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"Wei, omg you are finally awake!!!!, Can you stop being such a pig?? Do you know that i get bored"

"Haha.......... ouch..... stop making me laugh .... it hurts.... well at least i survived another time"

"Don't worry the doctor said that you are ok right now, you are luckier then those who were in the car crash down the highway this morning, 8 dead 3 wounded, cars were burned down to rubbles"

"Well, i guess i live another day for you to nag haha..... now get me out of this i feel like going down to the field"



As fate would have if you are destined to be together you would meet whereever you are in the world, but if you are not destined to be together even if you are at the same place at the same time you would not meet, he felt her presence, he heard her voice but he though it was just his illusion, maybe he missed her too much. He was always dreaming about her when he drifted in and out with the anasthetic. As fate would have it they missed each other by inches, she was there, just as she entered into the lift he turned into the hallway.

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When she stepped out into the field she could not believe her eyes, she though that she was hallucinating, but Kevin was standing there, right in front of her. Smiling at her just like the normal old Kevin. She smiled back. Not believing that it was true. They did actually meet. She actually missed him, finally.